Our precious daughter Claire was born on July 3rd of 2020. She arrived three weeks before her due date, but was born still.
My pregnancy was textbook; excellent heartbeat, normal scans, and physically I felt great. The day she died I had a prenatal appointment, but little did I know that that was the last time I would hear her precious heartbeat. As I was leaving the appointment the nurse gave me a sheet with instructions on how to count kicks. She explained that at this point in my pregnancy I was to do this everyday, throughout the day. So just like everything else related to my pregnancy, I was excited to start tracking her wonderful kicks.
Later that day, we went to a BBQ with my husband’s entire family. I was surprised that she wasn’t moving after I ate dinner. Eating dinner usually caused her to become very active! I quietly told my husband, so we tired the usually things; a very cold glass of water, etc. But rather than worry we called the hospital. They nurse from Labor & Delivery told us to come in. Because it was after hospital visiting hours, a nurse from L & D met us in the lobby. She was so kind, reassuring, and quickly got us settled in a room. A second nurse came in and performed an ultrasound, but after a few moments went to get the doctor on call. The doctor came in and the silence in the room was deafening. No words left her lips, she just furrowed her brow, took my hand and shook her head, “No.” At this point nothing seemed real to me. My husband cried out and grabbed me sobbing. All I could do was hold him tight and say over and over again, “We’re going to be ok. We’re going to be ok.”
I needed a c-section, but because I had eaten dinner only a few hours prior the anesthesiologist wanted to wait until morning. We were given the option of staying at the hospital, or going home and coming back in the morning. We decided to go home as a family one last time.
Our precious girl was born the next morning, and having her placed on my chest in the delivery room was the highlight of my life. I am so grateful to be her mom and honored that I was able to feel her kicks, hiccups, and hear her beautiful heartbeat.
Mommy & Daddy love you so much sweet girl...xoxo