Tristan Carl Faisan Chang

December 21, 2020
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My wife and I found out she was pregnant with our first child (our son Tristan) in Fall of 2016. On February 1, 2017, we decided to go to the hospital because my wife had said she had not felt Tristan move for a long time. There my wife and I watched as the nurse and doctor did an ultrasound and they informed us that there was no heartbeat. He was "born" that night, February 2, 2017 at 27 weeks. There had been a blood clot in the placenta. An autopsy had been done but the cause for the blood clot could not be found. We buried our son the next week.

A couple months later I was still having some troubles with my grief. My wife suggested I start playing Final Fantasy 14 because she knew I really liked that kind of game. I created the character, “Locke Tristania” and dove into the game. Named after my son and my hero from Final Fantasy 6, Locke, I felt a little bit connected to my boy as I played. And being so immersed in the game gave me a great distraction. I played the game until the end of the year. I decided to stop playing because my wife was pregnant with our second child and I didn’t want the game to be a distraction.

Since Tristan’s death I had wanted to do things to honor him. However my shyness had kept me from pursuing that goal until 2020. I hosted a Super Smash Bros. tournament at work and the entry fee that everyone paid was donated to the Star Legacy Foundation. A total of $550 was donated. Due to the pandemic, I cannot do the same thing this year and so I have decided to instead do a Twitch Charity Livestream. I have also recently gotten back into Final Fantasy 14 and Locke Tristania.

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